the four right chords can make me cry

went for the prayer meeting today. to be honest, it wasnt really to pray. It was the bay's turn to chair, so as a leader i went to show support and solidarity, i didnt really expect to gain much from it. but boy was i wrong.

in typical brethren fashion, the guys and the girls split into groups to pray. Even the old people do that, serious. so the guy's group was huge, like 15 ppl or something. us girls? me, jane (not from work), and joyce.

but it was really great. Joyce started. when she got round to praying for me, she really prayed out exactly what i needed, even though i didnt need it. Cos i've been battling low self esteem lately, i thought she'd pray about that (though i didnt speak a word about it, joyce has proven to me to be someone who just knows things). But she prayed for my results instead, which i realise is what i needed even more at that point of time. it's so amazing, that joyce knows exactly what to pray for even though we hardly talk, even though i never tell her anything. I want to pray as powerfully as she does!

what she said goes along the lines of God is the God of yesterday today and tommorrow. Thank Him for bringing me through the O's and giving me unexpected good results, thank Him for doing great things in my life at the present, and even thank Him in advance for my A level results! that really brought things into perspective for me, gave me alot of peace. I've been refusing to think about what kind of results i will get, i predict really bad results and tears and regret. but i was reminded today of what i should be expecting!

I prayed like i havent prayed in a long time. I really felt the words coming from my heart, i felt my prayer rising up out of me and into heaven. really cool experience.

another cool experience. just last night i was asking serene if she'd found her area of service in church. she said she had'nt and asked me how to go about doing it. I told her to fast and pray. so naturally she asked what i meant by fasting. to which i replied "giving up something, not necessarily food, and using the time freed up to seek God." so she jokingly said to fast icq. i thought about it, and figured it was a good idea, cos icq does take up alot of my time, and it keeps me up till like 4am. which is bad cos i wake up really late the next day and cant do anything productive. so i decided to reduce icq time. and today when i turn on my computer, icq doesnt even ask me to log in! its spoilt! haha, i get the hint God.

going to my piano teacher's house tommorrow to collect my grade 6 cert which she's been sitting on for months. argh... not really looking forward to it. cos im supposed to have resumed piano lessons after my A's. guilt. but to tell the truth, i was never a great pianist, and i dont know if i want to continue. so i guess that's why i never called her back. but i will have to confront that tmr. and you know i hate confrontation, im a wuss pacifist.

posted by beckyboo @ 1:41 AM